Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Violence panel

Wow. Today was very emotional. I first want to thank the panelists it takes a lot of guts to get in front of a group of strangers and be an open book about their stories. Today was also very triggering for me, I was raised in an emotionally abusive home by my mother and have had my personal space invaded by a drunk uncle who spent plenty of time in our home but she was oblivious to it. Her alcoholism alongside my dad's played a large role in my life. Although he was never the negative one. Alcoholism really destroyed my childhood, my parents were always verbally and physically abusive to one another with my mom being the initiating one. They said they stated married because of me, but I wanted nothing more than for them to seperate. Although I lost my dad to Alcoholism, my mom remains a very draining part of my life...a few good weeks, a few bad. It's hard to create distance when your in a Catholic family because the Bible is always used. As the panelists mentioned today, people almost always use it as a defense to validate the people who are in the wrong and forget the victims feelings in it all. When Q and ashley started discussing how their situations negatively impacted their belief in God. That was tough to hear, but I've been there. I've questioned why or what I did to deserve a life like of suffering. I have to remind myself that sometimes we suffer because the choices people who were supposed to make us feel safe made...and I can't blame anyone but those individuals. I also heard one panelist state that we have to question and challenge the church and the people who go there. I ABSOLUTELY agree..i left the Catholic Church and have since visited a Christian non denominational because of issues I had with my catholic church. I wanted to say that one of the most used words in the bible is LOVE. There is no exceptions to that...I love my sister who is lesbian, I believe in divorce, I don't want to get in a whole religious beliefs discussion. But I personally question alot of things about the church and am a believer so I'm glad he raised that awareness. There are several people who are believers but are open minded and accept things outside of what the Bible says is right and wrong.

Lastly to our classmates who were brave in writing and asking for opinions, thank yall for being real and open to exposing that. We have a class full of wonderful people who will always be safe people if you just ask. That's never easy, but there are so many options for us.

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